I have this student who does not lie, ever. His emails crack me up. Sent at 10:05:
I did not attend the class because I am sleeping until 10am and class finish at 10:50. Also today we will discuss the article about desalination and I did not read it so it is better if I stay in my dormitory.
other emails detailing reasons for non-attendance include staying up all night playing computer games, oversleeping due to having been unable to sleep because of drinking two Starbucks lattes when he was taking out a second year girl on a date and another because the topic in his textbook looked too hard.
Love that kid. The others give me bullshit about the ganmaos and la duzis.